Anecdote #28: When I was a kid, my mom wouldn't let me celebrate St Patrick's Day because she had a thing about the Irish, particularly the IRA who, at one point in her/our life, had an actual "hit" out on her Dad, My Grandfather who was acting Director of British Defense Intelligence in the early 70's. In her defense, it was a frightening time. One St P day morning I just Freaked Out, and begged her to "Please Please Please let me wear green to school." I must have annoyed the shit out of her because she conceded. I ran upstairs to put on every green garment I owned! I was so excited and that day, in a green sea of 70's, our small class sat in a circle to eat our packed lunches. I opened my Scooby Doo lunch box to a Great and slightly Embarrassing sight! MY MOM had dyed a Giant left-over turkey leg Green. It wasn't so much that it was Green, It was more the Turkey Leg itself, ala' King Henry the VIII and its enormity  took up the entire lunch box. I hesitated in taking this piece of food and using it as a prop to make the crowd laugh, but some things you are born wanting to do and I was hungry. Eyes coyly posed, I very slowly lifted the giant leg to my pie hole. The teacher caught sight, made a thing of it, and I experienced my first comedy bit. Good stuff!